13 Comments
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Dove Harper's avatar

Omigodddddd I fucking loved this. So cute. So slice-of-life. I really enjoyed the focus on the lack of visuals because she’s nearly blind. I personally strive to either include diverse characters or distinctly NOT describe the characters shapes sizes and colors because at the end of the day who gives a fuck. I loved it. I loveeeee it. Gushing.

Silken Mouli's avatar

Thank you! I do the same thing, usually I just sketch a character’s appearance briefly to give a hint to the reader, but then leave them to fill in the blanks for themselves, and only spend more words on descriptions if it’s relevant to the story or character. I’m really happy that you enjoyed this story!

Elara Rosalia's avatar

I’m so fascinated by this I can’t tell you💛

Completely in love with her

The writing is impeccable

Silken Mouli's avatar

Thank you! I try my best to make each of my characters distinctive, and I’m glad she made an impact on you. She was one of my favourites to write, I often think I should pick her up again some day, maybe when she tells me she has something more she wants to say.

Elara Rosalia's avatar

Oh I hope you do and I hope she does! Tell her that Elara is calling her back to the stage. Tell her that I want her courage, confidence, and wit when I grow up and that I was struck imagining the world through her eyes💛

Silken Mouli's avatar

Haha she'd probably say something along the lines of "what eyes?" But yes, something to think about. And thank you again for the love for her and her story!

Paul van der Varst's avatar

I found the quiet pace of the story suiting so well with the situation; she nearly blind and no door in the bathroom. I also liked the phrase "His lips feel soft on my knuckles, and I shiver despite the steam surrounding us. It’s corny. It’s cheesy. It’s various forms of food-related cringe."

Silken Mouli's avatar

Thank you for the lovely feedback! I am delighted you enjoyed my writing

Paul van der Varst's avatar

I forgot to mention that I liked the drawing. Isuppose you made it yourself.

Silken Mouli's avatar

I did, yes. Pencil and colour pencil on some paper, just a quick sketch. Glad you liked it!

shelleycat1's avatar

I like the story. You do manage to mix food into the story, the textures and the flavours building into the growing narrative.

Silken Mouli's avatar

Thank you! I'm really glad you enjoyed it.

Brinna | Erotica Writer's avatar

I finally got a chance to come back and read this one and I'm so glad I did! I absolutely love it!